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Bog Standard

Toilet humor has always been the comfort zone in everyday journalism, and writers stay alert to significant toilet tales and historic moments, notably connected to soccer. What a delight it was to discover that a prominent writer Adrian Chiles has a West Brom-themed urinal within his residence. Reflect for a moment about the Tykes follower who understood the bathroom a little too literally, and needed rescuing from a deserted Oakwell post-napping in the lavatory at half-time during a 2015 defeat versus the Cod Army. “He had no shoes on and misplaced his cellphone and his hat,” elaborated a representative from Barnsley fire services. And nobody can overlook when, at the height of his fame playing for City, the Italian striker popped into a local college for toilet purposes in 2012. “He left his Bentley parked outside, then came in and was asking directions to the restrooms, subsequently he entered the faculty room,” an undergraduate shared with a Manchester newspaper. “Later he simply strolled around the college grounds like he owned the place.”

The Lavatory Departure

Tuesday represents 25 years from when Kevin Keegan quit as the England coach following a short conversation inside a lavatory booth with FA director David Davies in the underground areas of Wembley, subsequent to the memorable 1-0 setback versus Germany during 2000 – the Three Lions' last game at the legendary venue. As Davies recalls in his journal, his private Football Association notes, he had entered the sodden troubled England locker room right after the game, seeing David Beckham weeping and Tony Adams “fired up”, both players begging for the suit to bring Keegan to his senses. After Dietmar Hamann's set-piece, Keegan moved wearily along the passageway with a thousand-yard stare, and Davies discovered him collapsed – similar to his Anfield posture in 1996 – within the changing area's edge, whispering: “I'm done. I can't handle this.” Collaring Keegan, Davies worked frantically to save the circumstance.

“What place could we identify for a private conversation?” stated Davies. “The tunnel? Crawling with television reporters. The changing area? Crowded with emotional footballers. The bath area? I couldn’t hold a vital conversation with the national coach while athletes jumped in the pool. Merely one possibility emerged. The toilet cubicles. A dramatic moment in England’s long football history happened in the old toilets of an arena marked for removal. The coming demolition was almost tangible. Leading Kevin into a compartment, I closed the door after us. We remained standing, looking at each other. ‘You cannot persuade me,’ Kevin stated. ‘I'm gone. I'm not suitable. I'll inform the media that I'm not adequate. I cannot inspire the squad. I can't extract the additional effort from these athletes that's required.’”

The Consequences

Therefore, Keegan stepped down, subsequently confessing he considered his tenure as national coach “empty”. The two-time European Footballer of the Year stated: “I struggled to occupy my time. I ended up coaching the blind squad, the deaf team, working with the ladies team. It's an extremely challenging position.” English football has come a long way in the quarter of a century since. Regardless of improvement or decline, those Wembley restrooms and those twin towers have long disappeared, whereas a German currently occupies in the technical area Keegan previously used. Thomas Tuchel’s side are among the favourites for the upcoming Geopolitics World Cup: Three Lions supporters, appreciate this period. This specific commemoration from one of England's worst moments is a reminder that things were not always so comfortable.

Real-Time Coverage

Join Luke McLaughlin at 8pm BST for Women’s Bigger Cup updates concerning Arsenal's match against Lyon.

Daily Quotation

“There we stood in a long row, clad merely in our briefs. We represented Europe's top officials, elite athletes, role models, grown-ups, parents, determined individuals with high morals … yet nobody spoke. We barely looked at each other, our gazes flickered a bit nervously as we were summoned forward in pairs. There Collina observed us from top to bottom with a freezing stare. Mute and attentive” – ex-international official Jonas Eriksson shares the degrading procedures officials were once put through by previous European football refereeing head Pierluigi Collina.

Daily Football Correspondence

“How important is a name? A Dr Seuss verse exists called ‘Too Many Daves’. Have Blackpool suffered from Too Many Steves? Steve Bruce, plus assistants Steve Agnew and Steve Clemence have been dismissed through the exit. Is this the termination of the Steve fascination? Not completely! Steve Banks and Steve Dobbie continue to oversee the primary team. Full Steve ahead!” – John Myles

“Now you have loosened the purse strings and provided some branded items, I've chosen to type and share a brief observation. Postecoglou mentions he initiated altercations in the schoolyard with youngsters he expected would overpower him. This self-punishing inclination must explain his choice to sign with Nottingham Forest. As a lifelong Spurs supporter I'll continue appreciating the subsequent season award however the sole second-year prize I envision him securing by the Trent, if he lasts that long, is the second tier and that would be a significant battle {under the present owner” – Stewart McGuinness.|